Boşluklar

Boş bir sayfaya bakıp ne yazacağını bilememek. Boş bir yola bakıp kendi kendine mırıldanmak. İnsanlar birazdan doluşurlar diye düşünüp kendi boşluğunu unutmak. Bir an boşluğu tanımlamak. Zihnimiz her gün bulanıklaşır ve pazartesiler cumaya koşarak taşınırken…

Birinci çoğul şahıs yerine konuşup sıradaki şarkıyı sadece kendinin söylediğini fark etmek. Kendi anlamsızlığını unutmak. Neden diye sorduğun zamanlar alamadığın cevapları bir daha hiç merak etmemek. Denizin boşluğu gökyüzünün boşluğuyla birleşiyor çoğu zaman. Eşitlik duygularımız kabarıyor. İnsan olmayı ekonomik seviyeye bağlıyoruz çok saçma olsa da. Akıl sağlığımdan şüpheleniyorum çoğu zaman. Bir müddet sonra ise saçmaladığımı fark ediyorum.

İnsanlar sadece bakınıyor. Görmek istemiyorlar ya da sadece inanmak için baktığı şeyleri görüyorlar. Durup dururken anlamsızlığa neden boyun eğiyoruz ki? İşte bunun cevabı yok, soru olarak kaldı her şey. Kendi boşluğumuza sığınıp kendimize susuyoruz. Bazen boşluğumuzda fazla tutunamıyoruz. Kendi kendimizi oyunun dışına atıyoruz, oyunun dışında mutlu şekilde yaşıyoruz. Yanılgıları çürütüp yanılmanın bir hata olmadığı kanısındaki tutumlarımız bizi şaşırtmıyor.

Anlıyoruz bugün bir çok şeyi. Adaletsizlik kol geziyor bir taraftan. Düşüncelere zincir geçirilmiyor. Sorgulamayı bıraktı insanlar. Dönüp dolaşıp boşluklara yerleştiler ve yeni boşluklara yer açıldı.

Tam anlamıyla boşlukta salınıp duruyoruz insan olabilmekle beraber…

0 thoughts on “Boşluklar

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